Category Archives: Guesties

Kid Foodies’ Grocery Lists…and Gross Stuff

Standard

I recently learned that a writer pal’s kids are total foodies and have some definitive opinions when it comes to eating. Instead of just being bored or trying to pop wheelies w/ a grocery cart when accompanying Mom to the store, these boys are into the experience. They agreed to be interviewed for SPGL. Dylan is 9 and Liam is 6 and 10/12.

Dylan and Liam raid the pantry

SPGL: Which one of you is most willing to experiment with new foods? What have you tried recently that was cool and you liked?

Dylan: “I am. New stuff that I like would be hard boiled eggs, asparagus, abalone.”

Liam: “Dylan is the experimenter. I tried Ostrich and it was pretty good.”

SPGL: When my brother was little, he would combine things kids don’t usually like – blue cheese and olives, for example. (BTW – he became a professional chef when he grew up!) Tell me about interesting combos of food you’ve tried.

 Dylan: “Vanilla wafers in milk until soggy; blue cheese on steak; blue cheese dressing on french bread instead of butter; my pie of mashed potatoes, ketchup, steak sauce, peas and meat. Oh, and dipping Skittles candy and jelly beans in milk.”

Liam: “I don’t know.”

SPGL: If you could manage a grocery-store trip by yourselves, you had your parent’s wallet and you could spend as much as you wanted, what stuff would you buy?

Liam: “Grocery store would be – cookies of all types, tortillas, beans (refried – clarification from mom), cheese, milk, strawberries, orange and green melon, raspberries, bacon, laffy taffy, and sour cream and onion pringles.”

Dylan: “Grocery list would be – candy like red vines, ice cream, horseradish, donuts, blue cheese (like 10 packs), other cheeses, tomatoes, tackys, hot cheetos, soda, hamburger buns and meat for mom to grind up and make yummy burgers, and beer for dad but they may not let me buy that I’m not sure.”

SPGL: As kids, my friends and I would mix up things like eggs, mud, bird poop, etc. just to see what it looked like. What totally disgusting stuff have you mixed together just to see how gross it is?

Dylan: “My friend put hot cheetos in strawberry chunk yogurt at school and it was so gross.”

Liam: “Anything mixed together is gross!”

SPGL: What are your favorite foods?

Liam: “Favorite foods are bacon, beans (refried), vanilla oreo ice cream, and that turkey lasagna from costco.”

Dylan: “My favorite foods are spaghetti with butter, blue cheese, tomatoes, coffee ice cream, any candy, ostrich, duck, watermelon, strawberries, pineapple and cantaloupe.”

SPGL: At the risk of creating “Kitchen Ninjas,” if you could bring any toys and/or tools into the kitchen to fix food or make interesting “sculptures,” what would you use? No chainsaws, please. 😉 (Although both boys checked first w/ mom to see if it was cool to answer this one, they did come up w/ some ideas.)

Liam: “Oh, I would love to use my Legos to make Lego cookies and Lego cake! I don’t know how that would work as they are kind of small.”

Dylan: “I would like to bring markers and paint but those probably won’t make anything taste very good.” (Mom told him you can buy markers and food paints. His eyes lit up and then he said, “Can you buy some, Mom?”) I also would like to use a hammer but I’m not sure for what, but Mom beats up the chicken sometimes.” (Mom says it’s a mallet to pound chicken and steak thin.)

SPGL thanks Liam and Dylan for playing along w/ me and thanks to Mom for facilitating. It’s great that you guys like to try new things and appreciate new tastes. Here’s to filling those grocery carts w/ even more new stuff!

Advertisements

50 lbs. of Dog Food, Beer and Soda – The Essentials

Standard

I think we need to mix it up a bit here at SPGL. After all, how many times do you want to read the words “cookie butter” and “wine” on my blog? Today, I have a guest blog from pal and fellow writer Thelma Michael. She obviously understands the intricacies of single-hood shopping and shares her astute observations below.

I am purposefully single.  That’s right boys and girls – it is a choice.  No, I’m not Hunchback of Notre Dame’s twin sister making this statement because I haven’t been asked out on a date in the last decade – I’m single because I refuse to be with an idiot.

There are a lot of idiots out there.  Which makes me wonder when we can pass an ordinance that there must be a stupidity test before one can procreate – but that is a whole different line of thought.

I am also a big people-watcher and the grocery store is chock full of entertainment for me.  Not just the people, but their carts!  Holy mother of god can you learn a lot from someone by their shopping cart.

But those observations can also bite me in the butt.  To come clean I have no butt because too many things have come back and bit me in the butt.  I really hope karma doesn’t start coming after the boobs next because I don’t have that much and if it takes those I will be left with the body of a pre-pubescent 12-year-old boy.   But that’s another story.

So I am a cart observer – I like to look in other people’s grocery carts.  I can pick out the single dad, the husband who was sent with a specific list and fellow single people. Like the angry gal who just broke up with her boyfriend. She’s easy to spot – two dozen cartons of Ben and Jerry’s, five bottles of wine and the super saver pack of Kleenex are dead give aways. Then there’s the frat boy living in a grown man’s body single-handedly keeping Frito-Lay in business, as well as the local brewery.

I recently went to the grocery store to pick up a few things, enjoyed my people/cart watching then ran a couple more errands before I went home. It was after one of these errands that I stunned my fellow patrons in the parking lot by literally laughing out loud once I reached my car.

I glanced in the backseat and all I saw was a fifty pound bag of dog food, a case of beer and two cases of soda pop! If it had been someone else I would have designated them the lonely dog person.  I swear I could hear my grandmother in my ear, “See what happens when you make assumptions about others…” Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I am a dog person.  After years of singleness on and off,  I much prefer the company of my dogs.  Don’t get me wrong, I love men – they are such simple creatures.  But my tolerance for them and their crap is pretty low whereas my dogs at least crap in my yard, not in my psyche.

Dogs don’t have to figure out who they are – they are a dog.  They don’t have a pendulum that swings from wanting to be in a monogamous relationship to wanting to hump everything in the neighborhood.   They don’t play hot and cold, they don’t care if you get fat or put green goop on your face to get rid of age spots.

And you normally only have to train a dog once, as with a man it is a continual process.  So yes, I am the crazy dog lady with the big bag of dog food so I make sure my dogs are always taken care of. And me? I get the soda pop to get me through the day and the beer for a toast to me at the end of the day.

Don’t judge me.

Thanks, Thelma. As soon as she stows that bag of dog food away, she’ll have time to launch her new blog and we’ll do linkies. It’s what cool, single chicks do.